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Showing posts from September, 2020

Emotional support dog

 Last night my 7 year old told me I'd make a great emotional support dog. I asked him what made him think that. He said he could picture me walking around all day telling a kid he could do it and encouraging him. As both a teacher and a mom, I can't imagine a better compliment. 

Sometimes I say dumb stuff

 I feel like I'm always writing about longing, longing for being a better me, success, better writing, more engagement in my own life longing to escape my flaws In person, I lean into my flaws. I call them by name as if to scale them to a height I can tackle. It's often hilarious. I make incredibly funny mistakes. I am likely to put my underwear on inside out and tell you in a disarming moment. I once fell off of a desk in a roomful of 8th graders during a video so the crash was thunderous. I was bleeding. I couldn't even pretend I was like a cat that hadn't just done that. Last week, I'd had a rough day of sassy backtalk from teenagers at work. This is not common in my relationships with students and I was a little on edge. After school there was a 40 min packed timeframe with my own kids, and to meet it, we'd have to be by-the-minute. I arrived to get one son and he was not ready, though his teacher had said he would be. I walked into his room, told him to get...
 You, the senior English class today, in September of 2020 are the rumble of a dumptruck starting up. That sound is the sensation of a building growl my throat.  I'm supposed to sing the song of tomorrow,       of the promise of college,                      but there is a growl in the way as I tumble.  Instead of a teacher, a cement mixer, I am a stone in the metal bin of a rock tumbler,   grumbling around, hoping I will come out polished and shiny with all the answers for them.  Someday I'll have every detail for you laid out perfectly                                                 a cloth with bedizened items well-lit, displayed   and you'll simply pluck all you need from the pile.  "tada! this one's me."  but for now...