This dad called me recently with concerns about his daughters. They're twins. His wife found them standing on a wet bathroom floor giggling. Sounds like normal twin girl stuff, right? The wet bathroom floor and the giggling was apparently because they were peeing on each other and thought it was hysterical. He did not think it was funny.
So I wrote this book and I think it's pretty decent. That's the feedback I'm getting anyway, which is bitchin' really since I have a degree in Education, NOT writing. Plus, this is my first try, so really I should be happy, right? But, turns out writing the book is maybe the easy part. The publishing is another story. You have to find a Literary Agent. To do this, you have to write a 1-3 page letter to many literary agents to convince them to read a sample chapter. Send it with a Self addressed stamped envelope (SASE) and wait. there's more but I'm already experiencing a high level anxiety just writing about this part. In my letter, I'm supposed to explain who I am, what my book's about, why I'm qualified to write it, why its sicky illy good, who'll read it, and on and on. AHHHHHhhhhh! This shit scares me. Also, I'm supposed to be witty, clever, literary, and junk. Oh and explain a 300 page book in a sales pitch. I'm not a frea...
there's a lot of money in that kind of stuff.
ReplyDeletei see a future for them, provided they go down the wrong path
totally kidding. that's awful. your parents read this. i have no idea how old your sisters are. my brother and i used to pee all over each other all the time. we are very sucessful adults and stopped peeing on each other when my parents deemed it time to stop letting us bathe together.
ReplyDeletealso, I had to change TWO lightbulbs yesterday and I almost threw up twice. I was in a cold sweat the whole time.
ReplyDeleteTHe first one took four tries. I peed twice during the whole ordeal. Pooped once. WTF is wrong with me? us? do normal people have this problem? I had to triple check the ones I removed. Double check the one that was waiting to be put in. I woke up in the night twice to make sure that the ones I installed were installed correctly.
Lora, you have a husband and a toddler and I'm sure there have got to be flashlights. Why would you change the lightbulbs? I can't imagine what would make me do it. I've asked friends and even a strange neighbor. Which might have been more dangerous than changing the lightbulb. But I was willing to accept the risk.
ReplyDeleteI have a brother who is 6 years older. No peeing, just punching. I pooped in the bathtub with my cousin once though. She didn't think it was funny. She still doesn't think it was funny. I kinda do though. Also thought the twins peeing was funny.
Is there a lightbulb changing phobia? I've never heard of that! The CFLs you put into an empty pasta jar and seal. Provided that someone hauls out the step ladder, I'll change your lightbulbs. I'm not cleaning up after the kiddos though. I'll just laugh and shut the door.
ReplyDeleteWhat do you do with them after they're sealed in a pasta jar?
ReplyDeleteTake to a recycling center! Or Home Depot. I'll do a quick post with linky links.
ReplyDeleteOur recycling center doesn't take them. I've checked.
ReplyDelete