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Friday Quotes

“I think I might have PMS.
Yeah?
Well… I’m bloated, feel fat, ate a lot of chocolate today, and I’m crying.”

“For dinner, what about… rotinni with rotinni with white sauce with ground beef and tomatoes, and waffle fries.”

“Something about a gay guy from Howard Dean’s campaign talking about the battle ground in Idaho just struck me funny”

“So I looked on our meeting room schedule today at the library and it read: Central California Hookers. Hmm, and I thought the meeting rooms were for not-for-profit groups only.”

“A judge has denied an Iowa man’s claim that he shouldn’t have been fired for repeatedly requesting help to procure a prostitute.”


”I saw a commercial tonight where the world was covered in bubble wrap and it made me think of you :)
I swell with pride.”

“I picked him up at his dorm the other day.
At least you didn’t have to pick him up from his mother’s basement. Or wait, will you have to do that over the summer?”

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Friday Quotes!

"You may be unusually energetic today because your key planet Venus received an unexpected wake-up call from electrifying Uranus." "Nationalism does nothing but teach you how to hate people you've never met--all of a sudden you take pride in accomplishments you had no part in whatsoever... " -Doug Stanhope "Drink that, DENVER!" Quiz Results: You are 48% mean "Is the junk yard dog losing her bite?" "Weak!" "F you Karin--your pretty face is going to HELL!" "Yeah it is, I might have had to spit on a homeless person but I got 67%" At the fireworks- "Where would patriotism be without the Chinese?" "The phrase 'I'm not racist but...' should just be replaced with 'I'm racist AND...'" "12 million homeowners and investors will be "underwater"--owing more than their property is worth." "I prefer up-side-down. Makes people sound like they've gone face...