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That one day after Friday Quotes!!

Allegedly this is Friday Quotes where I attempt to assemble the best quotes I've heard over the course of the week.

"Roses are red
Violets are blue
If you have a date for Valentine's Day
I hope he gives you herpes"

"I went to a restaurant and ordered a dessert called 'Death by Chocolate', but it only made me stronger."

"…feeling a little oogly and fogley, but it may just be the sloodge in her froodle."

"A lot just happened in my brain in the last 25 seconds. I had an argument with myself which I won."

"She's her own one-person telephone game."

"Haikus can be fun,
but sometimes they don't make sense.
Refrigerator."

"Without money or power, winning is useless."

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Friday Quotes!

"You may be unusually energetic today because your key planet Venus received an unexpected wake-up call from electrifying Uranus." "Nationalism does nothing but teach you how to hate people you've never met--all of a sudden you take pride in accomplishments you had no part in whatsoever... " -Doug Stanhope "Drink that, DENVER!" Quiz Results: You are 48% mean "Is the junk yard dog losing her bite?" "Weak!" "F you Karin--your pretty face is going to HELL!" "Yeah it is, I might have had to spit on a homeless person but I got 67%" At the fireworks- "Where would patriotism be without the Chinese?" "The phrase 'I'm not racist but...' should just be replaced with 'I'm racist AND...'" "12 million homeowners and investors will be "underwater"--owing more than their property is worth." "I prefer up-side-down. Makes people sound like they've gone face...