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Friday Quotes

"The key to having good balance is believing you had good balance. Ok, I just made that up. But if Kungfu Panda can do it..." -yoga instructor

"I'm morman."
"No way! Utah's my favorite place to have sex!"

"Do you know what biased means?"
"It means you like both boys and girls."

Teacher "The vagina has many purposes"
Male student "Amen to that!"

"Menarche sounds badass, like a medieval knight or something."
"Its sounds like some ceremony for royalty."

"I think you sat there and wore a green shirt on purpose. You're like one of those bitches from The Hills who just know the paparazzi are watching."

"All $400 does is remind you of how fucked you are. You'd be better off if your congressman just came and pissed on your foot."

"I love making my adolescent males cry." -a therapist

"That'd piss me off. I'd shit a kitten."
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