"I want nachos. More than I want a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. WAY more."
"I just don't like to watch sex abuse in the dark."
"Yeah, but did you see how you did it? I think you oculd easily become a bobblehead."
"Sustainability is for hippies and other free loaders. I'm going to pour motor oil on my lawn now."
"I hate myspace it won't even let you post a link. bitches. visit me on facebook, twitter, or my blog which is sillyswedishskier.blogspot.com"
"jesus christ. you twitter? are you serious."
"I am an interwebulous slut"
"I had a boyfriend who did the gas at a rave and passed out at the cops' feet. In high school I picked 'winners'."
"The way they get in is through the anus."
"Ass eatin' people are beyond my fuckin' understanding."
This one got torn so you feel free to finish the quote:
"Two eyeballs and an asshole. Well, you had a _____________"