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Friday Quotes

"Wow. Now I want to get an applesauce enema, shove chopsticks under my toenails, and kick a wall. Unless this post and all the comments are a joke?"

"My dick is so hot its stolen, your dick look like Gary Coleman"

"Who will teach the disabled to shoot guns if not you, Heath?"

"I'm actually wondering if there is a way to have dirty talk without cursing. Let's run through a few test cases:
"Oh, your manliness is so manly."
"Smack my rump."
"Your aeriola are as large as dinner plates."
I'm hot already."


"When dressing to travel by air, it's helpful to think of yourself as a mental patient."

"Karin? Wait is that the pooh girl?"

"You have really good parenting skills, especially considering you don't have any kids of your own, you know? I thought I'd give you an actual compliment instead of all those back handed ones I usually give you and then hear about later from someone."

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Friday Quotes!

"You may be unusually energetic today because your key planet Venus received an unexpected wake-up call from electrifying Uranus." "Nationalism does nothing but teach you how to hate people you've never met--all of a sudden you take pride in accomplishments you had no part in whatsoever... " -Doug Stanhope "Drink that, DENVER!" Quiz Results: You are 48% mean "Is the junk yard dog losing her bite?" "Weak!" "F you Karin--your pretty face is going to HELL!" "Yeah it is, I might have had to spit on a homeless person but I got 67%" At the fireworks- "Where would patriotism be without the Chinese?" "The phrase 'I'm not racist but...' should just be replaced with 'I'm racist AND...'" "12 million homeowners and investors will be "underwater"--owing more than their property is worth." "I prefer up-side-down. Makes people sound like they've gone face...