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Friday Quotes

I just ate White Castle for breakfast... SUCK IT DENVER!!!

I just discovered this new bourbon, Lucy something. I've been looking for answers in bottles for a long time, and you know what? Its all about the pussy control. Jack, Jim, George, none with answers... but Lucy, now that's what I'm talkin about."

"I feel like I only put deodorant in one pit today. Seriously, I'm sweating in one armpit."

"If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster. What would you have?
2 ft. of my cock in your ass."

"Oh, son of a swollen maggot-forking platypus!"


Young child: Can I have some candy?
Older brother: No, I'm not supposed to share. See (points to writing on label) it says do not share.

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Friday Quotes!

"You may be unusually energetic today because your key planet Venus received an unexpected wake-up call from electrifying Uranus." "Nationalism does nothing but teach you how to hate people you've never met--all of a sudden you take pride in accomplishments you had no part in whatsoever... " -Doug Stanhope "Drink that, DENVER!" Quiz Results: You are 48% mean "Is the junk yard dog losing her bite?" "Weak!" "F you Karin--your pretty face is going to HELL!" "Yeah it is, I might have had to spit on a homeless person but I got 67%" At the fireworks- "Where would patriotism be without the Chinese?" "The phrase 'I'm not racist but...' should just be replaced with 'I'm racist AND...'" "12 million homeowners and investors will be "underwater"--owing more than their property is worth." "I prefer up-side-down. Makes people sound like they've gone face...