Over the past weekend we had some friends over to celebrate Rob's birthday. I'm not sure how the topic of Rob's fear of aliens came up... (He gets really scared if he watches those alien watch shows late at night and I think its hilarious and might tell people about it a little too often.)
Which led to the question: What would you do if an alien walked through the door right now?
Now I had been drinking a wee bit at this point and earlier we'd had a talk about capturing and eating rodents, so it might have had something to do with my response.
"I mean, if its nice you'd want you know snuggle it or whatever... (thinking) but I've never tasted alien before. I might want to feed it milk and cereal for a week and try out the delicacy. You know, it might be the tastiest thing you've ever eaten. Who knows what it would taste like?"
A certain female guests looked at me horrified as her husband said, "Chicken. It might just taste like chicken." He appeared to ponder the question for a time too:
To befriend or to eat?
Maybe I should write a children's book about it. It could have a picture of a scrawny alien with arms too barren of flesh to hold up a toothpick and say:
"Befriend." (Notice the ribs sticking out)
Another page would picture a squat, vacant looking alien with cute little rabbit whiskers and say:
Oh shit but Alien would need to say:
"Stop pissing yourself and FUCKING RUN!"
What an asshole.
1 day ago